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This Monday morning memo is focused on taking care of ourselves as moms, a key step in taking good care of our children! One of the greatest adjustments I had to make post-baby was rethinking how I liked to spend my “away” hours and money for small pleasures. This may not seem like such a big deal, but those small treats often become even more important once we have kids. For instance, I quickly found after having a baby (and switching jobs so that I could be around the baby more) that I did not have the time or money to spend on getting my hair highlighted and cut every other month, much less the patience for sitting there for two hours. It no longer felt like a treat. On the other hand, my body was so out of whack from sitting in strange positions to breastfeed and from carrying the increasingly heavy baby around that a massage every few weeks became a necessity, not a splurge. Here are my hard-won tips for managing those shifts in priorities without sacrificing the act of treating yourself well.
HOW TO DO IT YOURSELF
Hair Color and Highlights: Through the encouragement of a good friend, I found the courage to do my own color from the box after seventeen years of paying a salon to do highlights and/or color. It was amazing. Not only did I like my self-colored hair more than when I came home from the salon, it was more evenly applied, looked better around my face, and faded more evenly. It also cost $8, as opposed to $100+. Inspired by the first success, I headed off to the beauty supply store for professional-quality color, developer, and highlighting equipment, all of which, again, came to the shockingly low total of $27. The results this time were even better, including the highlights. This was a mind-blowing revelation, especially considering how much I enjoyed doing it, how much better it looked, and how easily it could all be accomplished during morning naptime.
The Haircut: I was far more nervous about cutting my own hair, and had to wait until that mix of “desperate need for a haircut” and “total lack of time for a haircut” collided strongly enough to produce motivation. Using a pair of professional scissors from my friend who inspired me to coloring freedom, I started chopping late one night using the tips I found on YouTube and about.com. The result? Not the best haircut I have ever had, but it felt great, cost nothing, and looked better than my hair did 20 minutes before I started. This is a skill that takes a little more time to acquire or a friend to help you do it, but is definitely worth the effort. The Internet is a tremendous resource for this as well, and I fully intend to try my hand several more times.
The Manicure/Pedicure: I have always been willing to trim my own nails and cuticles, but I relied on salons to scrub my feet into decent shape and apply polish in a presentable fashion. Two new tools have now rid me of any need of the salon for this purpose: 1) sand and 2) nail wands. We encounter the sand during family trips to the beach, weekly trips to the sandy playground, and daily trips to our sandbox in the yard. Aided by a little pumice stone action in the bathtub, this accidental exfoliation keeps the bottoms of my feet looking great. Nail wands are another neat trick. In the drugstore, you can buy for a few dollars these brush-on wands that do all sorts of things, from strengthen your nails to condition your cuticles. They are easy to use each morning or night, and they keep my nails so healthy looking I do not need polish to conceal the nail. When I do use polish, I just put a coat of the fast dry wand over the color, and it looks salon quality, with very little money spent and very little time wasted.
Facials: There are a number of great at-home facial products now. My three favorites are Kiehl’s Microdermabrasion, Paula’s Choice Carbon Balancing Mask, and Bliss Triple Oxygen Facial. These three, aided by the antioxidant serum that Paula’s Choice sells, have done a better job at erasing wrinkles and tightening and smoothing my skin than any salon facial I have ever had. The cost of all three together is what one salon facial would cost. I use each about once a week and the results have been far better than I ever hoped.
WHEN TO PAY SOMEONE ELSE
Massage: Therapeutic massage was critical to helping me get back in shape, correct my posture during and after breastfeeding, and recover from illnesses brought on by sleep deprivation. I go every three weeks, and use it as a supplement to my yoga and pilates practice as well. Massage is something that your partner can do for you at home, but the truly therapeutic aspect of it – which is designed to help the body heal and strengthen – is best done by a well-trained professional. By eliminating manicures and pedicures from my budget, I was able to afford adding in massage.
Acupuncture: I have used acupuncture off and on for different issues throughout the years, and found it to be very effective for addressing problems that diet, sleep, and exercise cannot eliminate, but medication feels like over-treating. Insurance will often cover a portion of the visit, and the experience itself is almost completely painless and quite relaxing. It is certainly not for everyone (especially people with serious needle phobias), but can be extremely helpful.
Electrolysis: Instead of brow waxing, body waxing, and/or shaving, consider investing in electrolysis. It is less painful than bikini and leg waxing, and it is permanent. How long it takes to eliminate the hair varies from person to person and also on what amount of hair you want to remove. However, the end results are fabulous, especially if unwanted hair is a constant irritation to you. For small patches, like the upper lip and brows, it is a real and immediate financial savings. For larger areas of hair, the investment of several hundred dollars over the course of a year to eliminate the hair probably evens out with decades of buying hair removal products and services, but it is the time and convenience that you really save. While there is a quicker and much more expensive hair removal technique using a laser that is available now, the long-term effects are not really well known. The science of electrolysis has been around since the late 1800s, so if you have concerns about safety, it is a great and more economical way to go.
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